Stumbled your post .. cheers

Yes, many children have different dispositions, thank God most of them aren’t like this child, frowning all the time with a hateful look on her face and as Angie said, always wanting her way, I read and heard her say where Shiloh is woken up every morning with Z screaming in her face, the spoiled brat!

If your son isn’t potty trained yet and you / his pediatrician don’t think there is anything physically wrong, give him time. Don’t stress out over what other people have opinions about. Regardless if they’ve raised children or not (especially ones with GROWN children…time have changed and what was once thought was ’standard’ then, is outdated now). I can’t tell you how many times I have heard my Mother, Grandmother and husband’s grandmother say that after they see how I parent, how they wished they could do things over with their children – one of those things was ‘potty training’.

If your son does not notice / is not concerned / bothered by a wet and especially a dirty diaper then he’s most likely just not ready. Of course, in some children, it’s a physiological issue but for the majority of children, they’ll do it when they are ready – ESPECIALLY boys. Some don’t have the muscle control yet, others aren’t concerned about a wet diaper. Most likely, just when you start freaking out over it, he’ll be potty trained quicker than you ever imagined.

Perhaps (if he’s not yet PT’d) you can help him get the ball rolling by reading potty training books, taking him out to pick out his own potty (we have the Baby Bjorn that goes ON the toilet and another WONDERFUL transitional potty…can’t recall the name of it…Toyco?? Totco??? Looks like a REAL white toilet w/ a silver handle that has flushing sounds (both of my boys love’d’ that one)…give him lots of praise when he TRIES, if he goes in the potty, make a big deal of it, if he keeps his pants dry, make a REALLY big deal of it. Stickers…cheers…a silly dance…trip to the park, etc.

FYI: disposable pull ups won’t do justice for a toddler who isn’t interested in potty training since they do exactly what diapers do(except they dont’ hold as much)…they keep the moisture away from the skin area (there are new ones that make them feel wet / cold though). It’s a pain but the cloth training pants work the fastest. I used the cloth ones with an sewn on outer layer that held in the accidents but my son preferred the training pants from Hanna Andersson.

My older son (now 5 1/2yrs old) was ALMOST potty trained BEFORE he turned 2yrs old. Then we took a vacation for 3 weeks at my sister’s and he lost all interest, it was like he had never even tried before and nothing worked. His pediatrician said don’t force it, don’t make a big deal of it…yet I tried to ‘encourage him’ and it backfired, it just prolonged everything just as she said it would. He then was almost potty trained again and I had his baby brother and he lost interest again. He had to wear pull ups because of occasional accidents until he was a few months past his 3rd birthday and his pediatrician was never the least bit concerned (as were her partners). He’s a perfectly healthy and happy 5 1/2yr old and obviously doesn’t have any memories or ‘issues’ from being in pull ups until he was over 3.

My 2 1/2 yr old son is now showing signs of interest on occasion but DOES let me know when he wets his diaper or has a BM so that’s a really good sign that we are moving forward. He hasn’t kept his cloth training pants dry so we aren’t that far yet. :-) In fact, he refuses to wear pull ups, training pants, etc…he for now, prefers his diapies.

Don’t stress over it and certainly don’t make it negative for him. Watch for signs of readiness and give lots of praise and encouragement…it has to be beneficial for him in order to see that it’s worth the effort to try.

I found that most negative comments about raising children come from people who either don’t have children of their own OR from those that have grown children that raised them eons ago. Times have changed, some for worse, some for better but there is so much more wonderful parenting resources available now than there was before. Don’t let other people pressure you into stressing and making it a negative experience for you and your son. You are his mother, go with your gut. If you still feel the need to rush it, stay home for a few days, have him run around diaperless…have his potty he picked out and easily accesible to him and let him know where it is, give him lots of fluids and keep a close watch on him…when he starts to go, get him to his potty. If he misses, don’t make a big deal of it, just keep trying and if he sits on it, or makes an attempt to go on it, make a huge deal of it. He’ll get the jist of it and after this, may be closer to having the urge to ‘go’ register in his little mind.
When my older son was willing, I did this and literally, he was so close to being fully trained within 2 days. But he was WILLING and I think that was a huge factor in it. (It WAS work for me though :-). ) A friend of mine bought her son Thomas the Train pants and told him not to ‘pee’ on Thomas and it worked. It didn’t work for neither of my boys, they both think the character pants are itchy. I’ve also heard wonderful things about Dr. Phil’s potty training method. If I had a girl, I would totally try it but I wasn’t willing to buy a ‘potty’ dolly just to do this. The best of luck to you. and your son! :-)

PS- As for anyone else who may be offended by some of my comments, don’t bother to respond. I could care less and won’t be swayed or baited into an arguement or discussion going back and forth. There are NO standard timelines to when a child is ready for specific things (ie: potty training, crawling, walking, weaning, etc). Each child is different. To expect otherwise, makes me think of parents who are more concerned with social pressure or those who have control issues vs acknowleding when your own child is ready for his / her new milestone.

Embrace that and enjoy loving them and watching them grow. As long as your child is loved, cared for, happy, healthy, kind and considerate toward others and well adjusted…to ‘heck’ with anyone else who wants to gripe and moan about what THEY think should be expected.

Just kidding, luv… but I undersand your frustration. Girls are much easier to train than boys. I have a grown son. When he was a year old I started to train him and he was doing fine for a couple of weeks — and then he just lost interest, as if he realized he wasn’t ready for this yet.

I started again when he was around two, and it took a while, but he was fully toilet trained before he was three.

Some children take longer than others. As long as your little guy is developing well in all other areas and doesn’t have any genitourinary infections or abnormalities, I wouldn’t worry about it.

(If he’s still not trained by the time he starts kindergarten, then you’ve got a problem, but I’m willing to bet he’ll be out of Pampers for good before he’s four.)

I’m a clinical social worker with over 20 years experience working with children, and this is what I’ve observed from that picture:

Most two year olds will play alongside other children, but not with them. They don’t readily share toys with other children until they are around three. If they have a toy and another child comes up to them, their first reaction at that age (2 years) is to hold the toy away from the other child. They aren’t ready to share it with another youngster.

But in that photo, Zahara is holding the toys toward Pax, indicating that she doesnt’ mind sharing them with him.

That tells me a couple of things:

1) For a two-year-old, she’s socially ahead of her age. She’s learned to share with her parents with Maddox and Shiloh and she’s comfortable with them.

2) She seems confident in sharing and being around another child her own age. She’s not fearful of other children.

From seeing the above, I would guess this child is being very well loved and taken care of.

(And for those who commented that Zahara never seems happy — if you had papparazzi shoving a camera in your face every time you went outside, you might not look very happy about that either.)